Polish Harper’s Bazaar Interview ! PhotoVogue show in Milan, and exhibiting in Amsterdam !

May 17th, 2013

                                                                      Polish Harper’s Bazaar June Edition 2013.

Where do I begin with this little diary entry? I’m sitting at home surrounded by pieces of test prints, framed photos, notes on bits of paper, and a head full of things to remember. Its chaos, but the kind of chaos I simply could never have imagined 4 years ago when Wonderland first started. Above these words is a picture of my interview with Polish Harper’s Bazaar that hit the shops yesterday. Harper’s Bazaar …. !!! I still have to pinch myself that this is real, I think it will only sink in when I finally receive the hard copy in my hands. It’s beyond anything I could have ever dreamed of for Wonderland, it’s surreal, and marvelous…. and pretty impossible for me to get my head around. The original version the magazine sent me actually had a third page, but I guess that the advertisers squashed me down, I’m just so grateful it made it to print !

So the other huge news that has happened for me is that completely out of the blue I received an email from Italian Vogue’s ‘PhotoVogue’ editor, to be told that I had been selected as one of 25 photographers from 55,000 (!) to be exhibited in a group show in Milan at Galleria Carla Sozzani called ‘A Glimpse at Photovogue’ . The show will be a follow on from the one I was in last year, but this time they have selected a much smaller number of artists and will present 4 pieces each, to allow people to get a better understanding of the photographers style and personality. I am so humbled and honored to have made this final selection, and even more thrilled to say that I am sharing this happiness with two dear friends who have also been chosen. One is the amazing Zemotion who I met in Las Vegas at the [Framed Awards] and the other is my dear friend Kate Scott who creates the most beautiful flower photographs I have ever seen. So I’ve decided to bite the bullet and fly out to Milan for the opening on June 13th ….. excited isn’t the word !


You can read a little bit about it on the PhotoVogue blog here

So the next wonderful thing I have to write about is THIS  !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


You knew it was coming already after my last diary entry, but this is the poster for my Amsterdam show which will be opening on the 26th of May in conjunction with Morpho Fine Art Photography Gallery . I have already had my debut with Morpho earlier this week at the Kunstrai art fair which opened on Wednesday (see pictures below) . The fair will be on until the 20th of May, and is showcasing some of my most popular pieces that will be part of the main show next week. All of these huge prints are on dibond at 140 – 150cm wide and there will only ever be 5 of these sizes available to buy (ever) so if you have been considering investing in one of the large limited editions, this may be the time to make contact as they will all be going to the exhibition after the 20th.

Also for those of you living near to London I will be showing a number of smaller pieces at The Hampstead Affordable Art Fair with the Mark Jason Gallery, which runs from the 13th-16th of June.

FINALLY …… next week I will be shooting the second to last (ever) Wonderland picture, and the BBC News are going to come and interview me on the set (gulp) . I have been working on the final seven pictures since February this year, but unfortunately I have had to shoot all the scenes in reverse due to the types of weather I need for the story. Its always so incredibly hard for me to see other photographers zooming ahead generating lots of new images, while I am locked away in my studio in my overalls covered in glue and paint working at what seems like a snails pace to everyone else ! But I promise you, it will be so worth the wait, everything feels so right, and so beautiful, emotionally and visually. I needed to give Wonderland a proper ending, and that has taken time to produce, so thank you for your patience and hanging on with me when there never seems to be much happening outwardly to you all. I will of course make a video of the BBC News for those of you in other countries to see. Part of me is excited, but the other part is nervous that it will inevitably show you one of the biggest scenes I have been working on and I don’t want to let the cat out the bag, but theres no way I could say no to the BBC, so I’ll just have to deal it !

So that’s my round up for now…. If you had told me four years ago I would include Harper’s Bazaar, Italian Vogue, my own exhibition in Amsterdam, and the BBC News in one diary entry, I would laugh, pull a face and call you a liar…..  I’m sure it will feel real soon, but right now it certainly doesn’t, that’s for sure ………….

Best Conceptual Photographer of 2012 ! …. and announcing my solo show with the Morren Galleries in Amsterdam !!

April 22nd, 2013

 

I guess I need to start this entry with a rather feeble apology for how outdated this news is, but trust me the last few weeks have flown by I’ve been so busy…. I can’t believe it has been 6 weeks since I left for Vegas ! So as you can see from the title and the picture above, I am thrilled to say that I received the Framed award for ‘Best Conceptual Photographer of 2012′ !! It was a bit of a shock to be honest, as out of the 3 categories I had been nominated for, I had already mentality crossed myself off the list for standing a chance, so I was a little dumbstruck when they made the announcement ! But, before I go any further, I just want to say thank you to all of you who voted for me. I was so humbled when I heard the statistics, apparently Framed received over 400,000 votes to all categories this year, which is pretty unbelievable by anyone’s standards. So for me to try and imagine such a volume of people taking time to vote for my work is a strange and overwhelming feeling, and one I still don’t really know how to express my gratitude for. At the moment it is fair to say that 95% of my time is spent alone working on my pictures, I’m a bit of hermit to be honest …. always glued to my screen editing, or literally glued to the latest prop or costume I am making ! I still work very intensely …. every day, 7 days a week, permanently dragging myself towards the end goal of finishing Wonderland this summer. So to stop and think about the support other people have shown me and my work, none of whom I have met in person or even spoken to, is extraordinary…. really .. so thank you, and I truly mean it. Wonderland has been such a roller coaster for me, draining, stressful, exciting,…. emotional, …life changing, there aren’t enough words. It has been the full scale for me, especially since I left my job in 2011. There were days when I’ll admit I panicked about the choices I had made, leaving the security of my fashion career behind obviously being the scariest of them all. But on days like March 12th 2013, when I found myself in  Las Vegas, being given an award purely based on the opinion of others ….  its times like that, that give me clarity and  I know I chose the right path, so thank you for your confidence in me, it means so very, very much.
And (oh cringe) if you want to see me looking rather hyper active and wired  (nervous energy + terrible jet lag) here is a little video of me being briefly interviewed on the night !

And of course I insisted on having a cheesy Vegas – casino photo with the award :)

Anyway, I jumped straight in there with the mention of the award, but my whistle stop trip to Vegas was worth every minute, even if I did spend 99% of it in the windowless halls of the MGM Grand, and basically saw nothing of Vegas apart from the hotel suite that I shared with Ben (Von Wong Photography) and Renee (Renee Robin Photography) ! Basically I flew to Vegas without a clue about the fact there was an enormous photography convention happening in the MGM Grand for the duration of my stay. The event was called WPPI and was packed with industry leaders from all things photography – every form of camera gear you can imagine ,as well as all the accessories, photo papers, gadgets and gismos ….. you name it, it was there.  So from the moment I arrived I had Ben and Renee telling me to put some Wonderland images on my phone, and was then marched into the arena and introduced to a constant stream of companies.  I was a bit of a blithering jet lagged English girl with no idea where I was, but I soon went into automatic and started explaining the project to anyone who wanted to listen, and it was an incredible experience for me. The reactions to Wonderland were unlike anything I had experienced before, so many people were were so shocked at the level of work involved in the pictures, that it seemed to have a snow ball effect. I was passed from one person to the next and found myself talking to the likes of the head of marketing for Adobe ! I suppose I’m always used to talking to people who know my work, rather than introducing it cold, so for me this reaction was something I wasn’t expecting but was absolutely thrilled by. The  days that passed were a blur ( I was awake for over 30 hours before my first sleep!) but each day brought wonderful introductions and contacts that were invaluable. I gave away every business card I had, came back with almost as many from others, so for now there are some interesting developments in the pipeline, and I’ll let you know any news as soon as it happens.
But anyway, forgetting business ….. the truly lovely side of throwing myself on a plane, was that I got to meet some very special people, many of whom were distant Internet friends I never imagined having the chance to meet, and that was the magical glue that somehow kept me standing up, and held me together throughout those long hours. Aside from my room mates Ben and Renee, a few of the others I met were Brooke Shaden , Joel Robinson , David J Crewe , Aaron Nace , the crew from Framed , Phlearn , SLR lounge and a long term friend I’ve wanted to meet for ages the ridiculously talented Zemotion who incidentally won the Framed award for The Best Beauty Photographer of 2012.  So If you want a bit of a laugh and want to see us talking rubbish about how we met and briefly introducing ourselves, we did a little sound-bite film for SLR lounge just before Jingna (Zemotion) and I had to leave for the airport.  Silly as it is, I love this because it was just how we were during the entire trip, wired, non stop jabbering …. and a lot of giggles.

On my first night I took my only proper tourist shot of Vegas from the balcony of our amazing suite at the Cosmopolitan (That Ben had managed to get us at a fantastic deal) . Under mine (below) is Ben’s picture of the three of looking like over excited Vegas-virgins about to go off into the night ! Oh dear :-/  !

 

Finally (below) here’s one little picture that for me I think I will always treasure. It was just a little snap I took on my phone of Ben, Renee and Jingna walking back to the hotel, before I had to quickly pack my bags and leave. My feet were stinging from standing up all day doing the WPPI circuit, my brain was jet lagged mush, and I was filled with regret that I hadn’t made my trip longer to have given me one more day to spend with these new friends and enjoy the place properly. In the UK it was snowing, and this felt like the first time in months I had felt the sun on my face. It was just a tiny moment of beauty, standing in that pool of light, with tingling skin from excitement and exhaustion, knowing that the trip had been worth it, and I wouldn’t return home empty handed. Seeing the silhouettes of the three of them against the cityscape made me stop and remember my first early days, when all I had was a £40 compact camera I used to take my street portraits with. It’s  fleeting fragments of everyday magic like these, that first made me take pictures…. moments when reality looks like a film, when light, shadow and emotion collide and slow down…… and I see things as if from another persons perspective. Its hard to describe, but I felt a long lost jolt of electricity as I reached into my pocket for my phone to take a shot. As the laughs of the three of them drifted over the traffic while they jumped and posed and complained at my repeated requests ….. their energy was a warm as the sun in their hair and it washed over me.
For me its always these types of pictures that make me the happiest … its more about the essence of people and the moment, than the actual details if that makes any sense. The fact there are no faces makes no difference to me whatsoever ….. because I can remember them and how it was more clearly like this, than in any other way……….. just as a key fits a lock.

                                        AND FINALLY ……… ANNOUNCING MY AMSTERDAM SOLO SHOW !!!

So the other wonderful news I have to announce is that the dates are confirmed for my debut solo show with the Morren Galleries in Amsterdam ! The show will run for 2 months from May 26th – July 23rd, at Prinsengracht 572, 1017 KR Amsterdam  and will comprise of some of the biggest pieces in the Wonderland collection. I have been working really closely with my wonderful printers and have now started producing the pieces to be sent to Amsterdam. Its been so incredibly exciting to see the scale of the works, some of my favourite portraits will be displayed at 140cm wide and the clarity is so beautiful I wanted to share with you some pictures of the first ones to be produced. These pieces will be bonded on to aluminum and finished with a 1cm deep plexiglass layer to give a frameless finish.


My work was also exhibited for the first time last week with the Morren Gallery at ‘ART 2013‘ , and will also be available at KunstRAI on the 15th of May where I will be exhibited alongside Billy&Hell’s  and  Barbara De Vries under the Morren Galleries contemporary photography gallery Morpho .
So there is a lot happening right now! As well as all this, I am in the process of moving into my new workshop, which is slowly coming together, ….. and at the same time I’m STILL working on making the props for the final Wonderland scenes !

So that’s my very late and rather long update for now ! More soon, and hopefully some pictures from the art fairs to show you the big pieces in all their glory. I also have a very, very important piece of press with a very prestigious magazine coming in the next month which I cannot wait to show you ….  so I promise it wont be so long until I write again.

 

Italian Vogue, Harpers Baazar, my new representation by the Morren Gallery…. and a crazy last minute trip to Las Vegas !

March 9th, 2013

It’s been a long time since I’ve written a post that was simply about what is happening in my life and how things are changing for me. I always feel like I’m constantly chasing my tail playing catch up, and never have time to write in depth about some of the events that have been and gone over the last few months. The highs and lows have remained pretty extreme, but one thing I have come to terms with since leaving my fashion career behind, is that each new day can bring something completely expected, which pretty much sums up how January and February of 2013 have been for me……….

I have to start with the most important news, because this is something I am so happy about, I cannot type the words quick enough….. and that is to say I am now officially represented by The Morren Gallery of the Netherlands ! There are actually 4 galleries under their ownership and they have been established for over 20 years, exhibiting across the range in the arts from sculpture, to painting and now contemporary photography. Over the last year I have spent extensive time visiting galleries in London and Paris, as well as the world photography fairs like Paris Photo, Frieze etc. During which it became apparent that the two countries I most wanted to be represented in apart from the UK were the Netherlands and the US for their bolder approach to colour and scale.  So it was a wonderful surprise when I received an email from the Morren gallery about working together, and within 3 weeks I was on a plane to Amsterdam to meet them in person. To say that their galleries were beautiful is a huge understatement; we met in their main gallery in the city centre, and I also visited their brand new photography gallery ‘Morpho’ on Utrecht.  The interiors were some of the loveliest I have ever seen, and the owners Eric and Severine have been so warm, welcoming and excited about my work I instantly felt at home. To be honest it was like mum was there with me, nudging me with each new development …… it was exactly what I had been searching for, and I finally felt I had found the right place for Wonderland. I never expected such an immediate sense of connection, and had to pinch myself when I got home that night, there were no downsides, just a stunning gallery that loved my work and wanted a long-term relationship.
So I am now in the first stages of getting set up, and we are working together on presenting my work in the near future.  I will become part of their new artists collective of contemporary photographers know as ‘Morpho’ , which include the incredible duo Billy & Hell’s whose work is breathtaking and so powerful in real life. It looks like I will be introduced by the gallery at an art fair in the Netherlands at the end of April, and we are currently discussing my debut solo show in Amsterdam for the end of May. I will of course keep you all updated as things get finalised … so this is truly happy news, there is a lot to look forward to !

Top two pictures of the Morren ‘Morpho’ gallery in Utrecht. Bottom image is of the Morren gallery stand at ‘Real Is Me’ art fair 2012.

Secondly although I don’t tend to write about individual press anymore, two major features have happened for me that are also the stuff of dreams. My picture ‘The Ghost Swift’ was printed in Italian Vogue this month, and was also included in Chinese Harper’s Bazaar ‘ART’ magazine as one of their top favourite artworks of 2012!!  There’s not much I can write to express what both of these mean to me, sometimes I find it hard to believe how far Wonderland is reaching and the people that are noticing it. To think I made these costumes in my kitchen and it all started as a little dream, just doesn’t match up with seeing the results printed on those pages. I’m honoured, and can’t really write what I feel, but trust me there’s a little me squealing and tap dancing around my head right now :) !

Harpers Bazaar ‘ART’ magazine Jan 2013

Vogue Italia February 2013

Whilst I am talking about Vogue, it makes sense I finally write about the fact I exhibited my photograph ‘Lady of The Lake’ with them in Milan last summer. Those of you on my facebook page will know this as old news, but so much was happening at the time I never got round to writing it down in this blog. Crazy I know…. but anyway, better later than never!  Basically Vogue Italia selected 101 photographers from around the world from over 60,000 submissions to be in a group show presenting the best work from their ‘PhotoVogue’ online platform. I was sadly unable to attend the show as I was working on my solo show in London at the time, but here are a few little pictures from the event.

Finally I have a mish mash of a few other pieces to mention. The first thing is that back in December last year I was honoured to be approached by Dulux to become a judge for their brand new inaugural ‘Let’s Colour’ awards for the strong use of colour in my photography. It was a complete surprise but they asked me to join their impressive panel of industry experts in nominating individuals for their contribution to colour across the board from fashion to product design, textiles and art. The category I was responsible for was ‘The Colour Moment of the Year’ which involved researching major public events that brought colour into the lives of the general public on a grand scale in 2012. Obviously with the Olympics happening the spectacular opening ceremony had to be in my top three (which was the winner), although I have to say I had an incredibly soft spot for my personal favourite which was the moment the British invention of the Xyloband was brought to life in a spectacular burst of energy at the Coldplay live stadium tours last year. I felt the way it heightened the crowds experience of sound and colour together was an incredible multi sensory moment using British technology for a British band. It still gives me goosebumps every time I watch the video, and the personal back story of how it all happened I found especially inspiring.  I also got my teeth in the fashion category and was rather ‘vocal’ :-/ (oops)  during the judging day session we had in December about wanting my favourites ‘Sister’ by Sibling to win for their amazing designs, so I was really happy to see them win. It was a wonderful opportunity to be involved with such a vibrant event, and last week everyone came together for the award ceremony hosted by the amazing Hilary Alexander at the London Fashion and Textile museum, here’s a few pictures from the night …

Secondly I have done an absolutely huge interview (6000 words!!) with the US photography website Phlearn. I thought it was worth mentioning as it’s the first in-depth one I have done in over a year, and if you have time you might be interested in reading it ( although make sure you are in a comfy chair!)

Next up  is the very exciting news that after 4 years of making all my costumes and props in my back garden and kitchen, it looks like life is about to change quite dramatically for me. Hopefully within the next month I will be moving into my very own studio/workshop! I can’t even begin to explain what it will be like to be able to build my props in a proper space, it would change everything for me, and it looks like it will be going ahead soon! Heres a picture of the space, everything is still at the paper work stage right now but I cant wait to get my hands on this amazing room and fill it with crazy stuff !!  ………….

And finally ……. now for something rather ridiculous …………….. I’m going to LAS VEGAS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, I had to leave this to the end because can’t believe I’m writing these words…………. it is absolute madness on my part, but then again it will be a story to tell the grandkids in years to come I’m sure.!! Tomorrow I’ll be getting on a plane to Las Vegas for just 2 crazy days.  I’ve decided to fly to the US for the Framed Awards night seeing as I’m nominated for 3 of the catergories. I was being ‘gently harassed’ :)  by my friend Von Wong, to join him on the night being held at the MGM skylofts in Vegas, when I remembered that buried under all my junk from being a fashion designer I had over 10 years of air miles from business trips to Hong Kong. After digging them out I discovered I could get a return flight for silly money, and so I held my breath and booked my ticket.
I’ve never been to America before, and its a bit crazy I’m going for just two nights, BUT If Wonderland did win anything, this would be a pretty wild tale to tell.
So I’ll leave you with that …. I’ll keep my facebook page updated with any development while I’m there …. So for now please cross your fingers and toes with me and lets hope I bring something home !!!!!!!!!!  x

 

 

Wonderland …. The Arrival of Gaia

January 16th, 2013

‘The Arrival of Gaia’       (View Large here)

‘Gaia’s Promise’      (View large here)

‘Gaia’s Spell’      (View Large here)

This should have been such a glorious happy diary entry for me to write, as I have been waiting for the release of these pictures for over 20 months. They mark a point in the series I have yearned to reach and finally share for so long, that it has felt like a mountain peak forever in the distance, constantly out of reach with some days it just being impossibly far away. Back in April 2011 I completely underestimated how much work I had ahead of me in order to finish the Wonderland series, and at the time I decided to shoot these pictures out of my planned sequence, so I wouldn’t have to wait a further 12 months for the yellow rape seed to flower.

It would be fair to say I have never been so wrong in my life about how long it would take me to reach this point. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine it would be almost two years until I finally made them public, and I cannot express enough how grateful I am to my wonderful model Marianna for being so incredibly patient and understanding. It was a ridiculous amount of time to wait, but equally I was in an impossible situation, as all the pictures have a specific order, and these simply had to wait their turn. So for months as I have inched towards this goal, ticking off my completion of each new picture. I have romanticised about all the things I was going to do when I reached this point. How I was going to stop working all weekend, learn to cook, and generally be kinder to myself and not work so hard …. all because I will finally be on the home stretch to finishing the series. ……… BUT
But to be truthful today is not glorious, and to be honest I’ve been crying for hours. It sounds so stupid and I wonder if I should even admit it, but I’ve always been brutally honest in this diary so why stop now. The truth is two days ago I lost someone so precious to me it hurts to even type these words. I say ‘someone’ because I refuse to call him a pet, and I can already imagine a few of you are rolling your eyes right now, but It’s how I feel and so it’s what I write.

You see after I lost my mother I adopted a truly magical little boy called Georgie, who was a stray from the cat shelter. He saved me from completely falling apart, and became my lucky little talisman throughout all the years I have worked on Wonderland. Many of you will recognise him from the behind the scenes photos, as he was constantly lying on the costumes and props, and has been my constant throughout everything. He lay next to me at night while I edited and kept me company while I painted my props in the garden during the summers that have passed. He was only 6, and on Saturday he became critically ill, and after hours of fighting for him at the vets I lost him. I guess I wanted to write this because this diary entry wont be the usual huge explanation of my working process, and reasoning behind the pictures. I’m just too sad. Typically He is in a quite a few of my behind the scenes photos and sitting here right now looking at them I just feel numb

So please forgive me as I go into a slightly robotic account of how these pictures came to be. I’m tired and my eyes hurt, and I just want to finally get these pictures out and into the open for you to enjoy, and for me to feel I’ve reached my little mountain top. I love the pictures and I am so proud of them. Second to The Queen’s Armada these are the biggest undertaking I have ever attempted, and the first time I have had so many assistants and such a huge responsibility to get what I needed in a short space of time. I also want to add that I will share finished costume pictures of the dress and headdress in my next diary entry, as you will be seeing this character again in further scenes after these.

Ok …… this is how it all came to be….

Part 1 ‘The making’
The other really sad part about this diary entry is that after spending two days searching all my hard drives and back-ups I cannot find all the photos I took of us making the giant yellow boat, or all the stages of me making the enormous headdress. I think my brain is just frazzled right now and I may stumble on them in the future. So I have some behind the scenes pictures, but nothing that truly shows the enormous amount of work and mess we made creating the boat in particular.

 Mark Dawkins, chief ship builder extraordinaire !!

 I am however relieved I have this one photo of my friend Mark, who saved me when it came to making the boat. Without him, everything would have been a disaster, and I am so grateful to him for all his help. We’d known each other for a good few years but Mark had never helped me with Wonderland before, and I think we both had so much fun creating this piece it will remain a happy time for both of us. Sometimes stepping out of real life to make something ridiculous can be the best medicine, and I think Mark felt exactly the same as me about this prop. Escaping to your childhood and building a giant yellow ship in your back garden can be a tonic like no other, and even now writing this, despite how sad I am, there is a smile creeping across my lips because I have such fondness for the week we spent preparing for the shoot.

 The boat started life as a rotting old fibreglass rowing boat that had been abandoned in a fishing lake near my house. So after getting permission to take it away from the fishing club, we brought it home and cleaned it out in my garden. It absolutely stank and was in terrible condition.  The first stage was for my husband Matt and Mark to build a wooden frame inside the boat to stabilize it and allow us to construct the masts. The entire outside of the boat – all the plank details, and front bow are actually made from painted cardboard! I had a wonderful assistant Hannah Coates who came and basically lived with me for the week before the shoot, and the pair of us spent the week painting endless cardboard planks, while Mark bolted them onto the boat. The effect was so convincing we were all ecstatic with the results! At the end of the week two more assistants joined us and Adam Richardson made the crows nest (which he was very proud of) and Rosie Hardwick helped me and Hannah frantically make the sails. Finally Steven Read and Phoebe Cheong joined us on the day of the shoot as well.

The second biggest undertaking for the shoot was THE DRESS. I had always wanted to bring back The Lavender Princess’s dress into the series as a familiar signature of my work, but this time I wanted to make it even bigger. When I designed the original lavender dress it had been partly made by myself and a factory who are very special friends of mine in China called Affirm Heart. I had worked with Affirm Heart for a decade as a fashion designer, and they are like family to me. They have always been so excited and supportive of Wonderland over the years, that when I asked them if they would help me re-create the original dress in bright yellow and make it in super-size proportions they agreed immediately. So here is the how it all came together. The dress is made from silk georgette, took almost a month to make, and involved 20 workers. It was an epic undertaking, and was so big the model had to stand on a table for the shoot, with an enormous hooped under cage to hold out the shape.

 

The dress panels being cut from the silk

The dress involved hundreds of curved silk frills , that had to be individually cut, sewn, turned inside out, pressed and then mounted onto the dress base.

As you can see the dress was so huge the makers had to stand on the factory tables to steam it !

 spot cleaning the cloth

The amazing pattern cutters and chief makers of the dress standing next to their finished master piece :) At this point it is still hard to tell just how huge the skirt is without the undercage.

This rubbish phone picture helps give an idea of the scale. I took this picture when the dress arrived the day before the shoot. It was so big, I could only get the skirt part on the dummy before it touched the ground.

 The night before the shoot we had a manic few hours where we realised the under skirt still wasn’t big enough for the dress. So I had to pull together every single last bit of net and tutu underskirts I had in the house to build more padding. Elbie took this photo of me just after midnight standing on a table trying to see if we had made the shape big enough!

Finally the other huge costume piece I made was the amazing headdress. The headdress took me 2 months to make and was so much work I can’t even begin to explain it. This is where I am sad I’m missing so many of the construction photos, because it really was an epic piece of work. What I will say, is that you will see it photographed properly in my next blog entry, and that there is another Wonderland picture coming later with it, so you will see more detail eventually. I made the entire design myself apart from the crocheted flowers and hearts. The wonderful lady who made them is called Nora Taylor, and I found her randomly through eBay of all places. She lives in a tiny little village on the Scottish borders looking after her husband and has been crocheting for over 54 years !!  I asked her if she wanted to make me A LOT of crocheted pieces and she did an amazing job. She also crocheted a scull cap, which I wove yellow painted plaits of hair through to create the base of the headdress.

 

Nora crocheting the flowers

So here’s the picture I was dreading looking at. My precious little boy Georgie, being naughty as always lying on my base for the headdress. God I miss him :(

Headdress finished stage 1 (basically all the crocheted pieces, plaster base, and woven metal shape covered in knit pieces)

The headdress was an epic undertaking. I basically made it up as I went along, although I knew I wanted to create a kind of ‘Inca Sun Goddess’ look. It is created from the most utterly bizarre elements. The base is plaster with a metal scull cap set inside it for strength. The main fan shape is woven metal mesh covered in pieces of jumpers I bought from ebay, hand dyed yellow and stitched together. The front construction is from a giant wooden Chinese fan with the fabric ripped away, and then of course topped off with Nora’s amazing flowers and hearts.

After I had reached the first stage, I spent weeks hand beading and painting vintage pieces of decoration to add detail to the design. I cut hundreds of hand dyed petals from silk flowers and added them to the crocheted flowers. I customised old Victorian cape fastening details, tassels, wax flower centers …… honestly it was just a bit mad how much time I spent on it, but the results were utterly bonkers and really worth it.

Finished Headdress.  – as I explained earlier there will be better pictures of this coming soon !

Finally, just to add to all the sillyness, I needed to make a model boat. I actually made it in 2010 when I first began planning this shoot. I bought a kit from the internet for a child aged 7-9 …. it came with no instructions and took me two solid days to make, to my complete embarrassment and frustration ! I then painted it, and decorated it with old Indian jewellery that I enameled yellow to match. (Mike Cluffe if you are reading this… this is THE BOAT I told you about about over 2 years ago!)

I can barely look at the damn thing it was so frustrating to make !

So that was my quick tour of ‘The Making’ ……. Now here is Part II -The behind the scenes of the shoot

The location was just incredible, and one I really had to fight for. It is one of the biggest rape seed fields in the south of England, which has won awards for its crop. The farmer understandably took some persuading, and wouldn’t let me shoot the boat on the actual crop which had been my original plan. But actually all things happen for a reason, and because of this I discovered an amazing old tree in a corner of one of the fields.  The curve of the crop and the framing of the trees branches made a far more romantic English setting in the end, and the distant rise of the fields and the little lollipop trees just don’t look like a real place. Thats why I love this shot of Adam standing in the location before everything was set up… it was magical before we even arrived :)

Like I have always said …. sometimes you just need to remember nature is extraordinary, and that is why all my locations are real, and worth waiting a year for the field to bloom.  Looking at this now I just wish I could be back there and feel the sun on my face,  and know that Georgie was alive and well, waiting for me at home.

So this is us setting up the scene. The boat suddenly looked so small once it was in the huge field and out of my back garden! We had to hire a truck to get it to the location and there were 9 of us on the shoot – the most people I have ever used.

I’m so proud of the boat, I cant believe how good it looked on the day. On the way to the shoot we passed a load of wild yellow flowers hanging from the trees by the side of the road, so we stopped and cut some to decorate the side of the boat. Here’s Phoebe and Hannah helping to get them in to position.

The weather became quite windy in the end which was perfect to add some drama to the sails.

As I often show in this blog, I think one of my most vital pieces of kit is a step ladder ! I rarely take a photo from human height, I think its to do with seeing the scenes as paintings – experiencing them as I imagine them, like huge dramatic dreams. Not from a small point of view if that makes any sense at all. You will also see from these pictures that I added the clouds to the final finished image. I am always clear about how I produce my pictures and this is one of the few shots in Wonderland where I had to composite an element in. I wanted more drama for the picture as it was all about Gaia casting a spell and I needed the heavens to look like they were somehow involved. So The day after the shoot the skies had big dramatic clouds, and I went back to the location on my own to get the perfect sky from the right perspective.

Love this picture of Adam and Marianna, the scale between them is so funny :) this was Adam trying to light the smoke bomb attached to the ship

After we had completed the biggest shot involving the boat, Marianna and I walked deep into the flowers for her picture ‘The Promise’

Another feature I often try to create with my work is make solid back grounds of pure colour . For the headdress scene I was getting too much sky behind the model, so we hung the yellow flowers we had decorated the boat with from a pole behind the model to fill in the gaps. It worked beautifully…. but was pretty boring for the people holding the pole. This picture of Eblie falling asleep says it all really ! After we shot this scene I shot ‘The Arrival of Gaia’ which was such a beautiful set up. I think Marianna was pretty exhausted by then, so the pose of her resting back against the tree in the low afternoon sun was so peaceful, it was a really natural and a lovely picture to take after all the chaos. The huge rushes of fabric are completely real and not manipulated in any way, it happened by chance just as we were about to pack up. One of my assistants lifted the cloth trail to pull it away from the tree and the motion with the wind transformed the entire mood. So we re-shot with everyone pulling the fabric in the air and the results were wonderful.

Finally after the tree scene,  I took this photo of Marianna just as the sun was getting lower in the sky at around 5pm before we left the location. The colour was so intense it looks utterly magical.

So that was the behind the scenes, all there is left now is to tell you a little bit about how these pictures came to be part of the story, and what they stand for. I feel sad I can’t throw myself into my usual mode of telling the story from the heart. but I’ll do my best, so as not to leave people with a whole load of questions, I hope you can understand x

With the arrival of Gaia, we are now entering the penultimate stages of Wonderland.  The name Gaia is taken from the ancient Greek goddess who was seen as the personification of Earth, – basically our modern day ‘Mother Nature’. For so long Wonderland has been in heavy emotional darkness, as we have moved through the swamps of The White Queen, the dark woods of King Gammelyn, the twisted tree roots of The Ghost Swift and The Queen’s Centurion, to pass under the Autumn trees at the start of Katie’s journey towards home. Underneath it  all there has been a turmoil, until Katie’s final awakening in ‘Let your heart be the map’.  The reason for the powerful light on Katie’s face, and the breeze in her hair was to link it to the moment she witnesses Gaia for the first time.  Gaia is her salvation, and the one who has come to take Katie (and us) home. She arrives in a blast of sunlight to lead Katie and the key onto the right path. As I always said the colour yellow was significant, because for me is has always meant home, both in the story of the Wizard Of OZ, but also in my real childhood growing up in the fields of Kent, where rape seed was always a part of the landscape. In these new scenes we are viewing Gaia through Katie’s eyes, as we move from her arrival to ‘The Promise’ and finally ‘The spell’.

You will notice that looking back over Wonderland from  the point of ‘An Ocean of Tales Until the Shores of Home’ most new characters can be seen clutching a galleon ship … in some cases it is tiny and hidden, and in others they appear larger and larger until they reach the size of ships belonging to the White Queen. These have all led to this point, and have been a precursor for “Gaia’s Promise”. Here we are brought deep into the flowers, where Gaia speaks of her promise to Katie, how she will help her to go home. The tiny boat in her hands becomes a spell, and in the last frame we are faced with a life-size ship, ready to take Katie’s on her final path.

But for now this is all I can write ……  your imagination should be guided in the right direction, until the next scenes are ready to continue the story, and lead us all to the end of the series ………………….   And maybe if you have a moment, for the first time since I started the series I now feel I can look back over the entire project so far with a genuine satisfaction I have covered the goals I set out with. All the colours, all the seasons,  the good and evil, if you’ve never noticed it, you can see all the pictures in one big view on this page here

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Finally (back to reality) I have a couple of things to mention. Firstly I have some amazing and unexpected news to announce. I have been nominated for 3 of the 2012 [Framed] Artists awards for Best Conceptual Photographer, Most Influential Photographer of the Year, and most importantly the ‘Big F Award’ for the Wonderland Series. All the nominees where voted for by the public and the photography industry, and to my complete shock I am in the final selections, along with some very special fellow photographer friends from around the world.  This means Wonderland could actually stand a chance of winning an award, which feels pretty extraordinary for me. So many of you have already voted on my facebook page, but if you are reading this now and would like to show your support by voting for me the link is here. I’m so grateful for everyones support, I never imagined to be one of the finalists, it honestly means the world to me xx

The other reminder is for those of you in the UK I will be giving my Wonderland talk on the 26th of January at Lisa Devlin’s Photography farm. To book tickets and read more about the event follow this link

And……… finally I just had to post this little picture, its one of the first pictures I ever took of Georgie and will always be the one that I cherish the most. I had grown up with pets all my life, but had never experienced the connection I had with this magical little bear. It’s because of him I gave up meat and felt a far deeper understanding and connection with animals. We need to respect all forms of life and care for them to the best of our ability. This picture always felt so direct and real to me, like a there was true soul looking back at the lens. Through my time with him I learnt so much, and as a person I have changed. So these new pictures are dedicated to you my sweet little furball, thank you for saving me when I felt I couldn’t go on…. rest in peace dear friend x

Wonderland – The Journey Home Begins ……………

January 8th, 2013

The Journey Home    (view large here)

 The Guidance of Stray Souls    (view large here)

Let Your Heart Be The Map    (view large here)

I’ve re-written the start to this diary entry so many times, that I’m giving up on trying to introduce these pictures in any proper way. So I’m just going to begin from the heart, because it’s what feels the most natural for a set of images that have brought me so much happiness.

Recently I gave a talk at my current exhibition at Quaglino’s in London, and realised afterwards, that every picture I had described as being deeply emotional for me had not been taken this year.  That night on the train home, staring out into the darkness I wondered if I had lost my way from the origins of the project, and the human connection that lies at the root of all I try to do. I love the pictures I have produced, but the shoots had definitely become larger more complicated productions, and as a result at times had been more stressful.  I guess I wondered if I had lost a part of me somehow. The last few months had been relentless, I felt I needed to let go…. to breathe, and be outside in the landscape. Maybe I needed to be reminded of who I had been on those first early days in 2009, when nothing else mattered… just the moment, the light… and the dreams I so desperately wanted to create.

Writing this now, I am so grateful to say that everything I worried I had lost, was returned the day I took these pictures. The emotion I have for them is so strong, it’s strange… it feels like they came to me just at the point when I needed them the most. They are my comfort …… based at the heart of all the things I care about the most – nature at its most extraordinary, precious friends and the bond I have with the woodlands. The set up was stripped of complicated props and detailed costumes, it was simply about Katie, quiet in the early morning cocoon of the trees and the emotion she conveyed. The pictures carry so much weight for me in how I felt, but also in that they are a turning point in the story of Wonderland…. because these scenes mark the beginning of the end.  They are the start of Katie’s  (and my own) journey home.  Maybe this is why I feel so close to them, because I know I am finally on the path to completion. It has been three and a half years, of all I can physically and mentally give, and by the time it’s done I expect it will be almost four. I never imagined the project would take this long, or that my life would have become what it has. Katie as a person always somehow channels that unsaid link I need throughout the series. At times she almost becomes a mirror, a self-portrait for myself, and the viewer. Her pictures are always the ones that underpin where I am in the real world, its strange it always happens like this, but it does……. and I feel so lucky to have this connection with her.

Early stages of making the giant leaf cloak.

all the leaves were graded in sizes before starting.

My finished leaf hood, which I absolutely adored. I was ridiculously proud of it, and so sad it would never last permanently for me to be able to exhibit it.

The finished cloak and hood at 1am the night before the shoot, after 48 hours of utter madness trying to make them in time!

Like many of the coloured landscapes in Wonderland, the autumn leaves were a moment I had always wanted to capture in order to balance the seasons and tones of the collection. I had always said my wish was to record every colour nature had to offer, every seasonal extreme we can experience.  As the years have passed, so had my chances, and like the fields of flowers, the vivid leaves would appear all too soon and then disappear in the blink of an eye.  I came to learn that this ‘high point’ of the perfect red and yellow leaves was just as fleeting, and knew that this year would be my last chance.  To be honest I still don’t know how I managed to push myself through the days before the shoot, it was all so fast, but the adrenaline of ‘now or never’ kept me going. It was a Monday morning in November and I had five days before I left the UK to spend a week in Paris. It was one of those dawns where the low winter sun sets the colour of the trees along the road on fire, and I realised the leaves were turning and falling.  With less than a week, I would have to find a location, and make a costume. Part of me wanted to leave it until after Paris, but I knew it would be too late. So I spent two solid days driving and walking looking for yellow woods. I visited every place I could think of, with no luck. I walked until I was lost, and spent hours chasing the coloured trees on the horizon, all-resulting as a mirage ….. never yellow when I reached them. The colour yellow was vital to my plan, and is highly significant to the story and the ending of the series. I even posted a plea for help on my local community website to find a location, but it was only after feeling completely defeated, that the concept for the scene dawned on me. I had found myself in a wood almost an hours drive from my home, staring up at the most beautiful red trees wishing with all my heart for them to be yellow, when suddenly everything fell into place. I wanted the picture to be purely about Katie…. alone, with the focus being on her journey.  As I stood looking at the crumpled yellow leaf I had kept in my pocket from my garden, I realised the impact of its colour against the fallen red leaves at my feet.  The contrast was far more powerful, it could become a way to show Katie’s energy shining in the landscape. So I started photographing my tracks, and walked deeper into the trees, eventually I turned and looked back to be faced with a long winding path that melted over the horizon, I knew then that I had found my place.

The days that followed were a race against time as I only had 48 hours until the shoot. I spent a morning clambering around in the grounds of my local hospital garden where I had found the purest yellow leaves I could source. The ground was thick with their fallen cousins, but the best with the purest colour were still on the trees.  So I jumped, and tugged, and huffed and puffed, clambering around the branches like a mad woman, filling my bin bags, praying no one from my street would recognise me!

Preparing Katie’s hair, the hood needed to sit high on her head so Elbie had to pad out a shape to support it.

Me and Elbie making Katie’s trail of leaves

On the day of the shoot we set out as early as we could. It was just the four of us, the original gang from the very first pictures back in 2009. I sat in the van staring out the window clutching my precious hood made of leaves, while the step ladder and equipment jangled and shook in the back. Arriving at the location it felt so good to only have a few things to carry, so we marched off into the wet mud carrying the giant yellow leaf cloak between us.

I rarely shoot two pictures that look similar, but in this case there is a deliberate transition across the three frames I have chosen to portray this part of the story.  I imagined them as film stills of Katie’s journey, and intended them to express the physical aspect of her traveling towards us. That is why the first was framed from a distance with the emphasis on the landscape and the direction of her path; I suppose I saw this as her turning point.  The trail of leaves was to express her movement – without realising it, these connecting trails of powdered colour, fabric or flowers have become something I constantly re-create in my works, and is my way of depicting motion within a single frame.  The sequence was about Katie hurrying away from the Queen’s Centurion with the precious key. Its why I choose to make a cloak instead of a dress, the pictures are about her protecting the key, and Katie’s need to pass through the woods unseen. I love the fact that although she appears almost anonymous, the bright blaze of yellow betrays her – as though her light and goodness is shining through the disguise. I’m sure by now you think I sounds like a babbling fool, but trust me I know what I mean!

I rarely take a picture from normal eye level, and am always climbing tree stumps, or grovelling around on the floor on my shoots. Heres an example of our low-tech kit ! 3 Tesco food crates and a step ladder ! Oh dear !

For the second shot I positioned Katie closer, she appears in a dream-like state, sleepwalking as though under a heavy spell, moving yet unconscious of her surroundings. It is here the key around her neck is now visible; I wanted it to be seen to be  guiding her as much as she was protecting it.  I love the solitude of the picture and how lost and alone she seems; yet by the very nature of her clothes she will always be a part of the woods. This is how I have always felt since losing mum, the woods are the only place where I can feel calm and pull myself together on the bad days when I miss her the most. In short, I wanted the second picture to be a moment of quiet contemplation before the final awakening of Katie’s close up.
For me it is the final picture ‘Let Your Heart Be The Map’ that means so much to me personally. There were many times during editing, when my headphones were flooded with film scores, that I found myself lost in the moment with my eyes full of tears. It is hard to describe, but for me it is a picture of Katie, but it is also a picture me, and maybe you too if you have been following the series and ever felt connected to it.  It is a parallel between my own life, and Katie’s character in the series. Sometimes staring at my monitor I felt like I was looking in a mirror, with both of us on opposite sides of the glass. You see Wonderland has always been my escape; I have spent its duration  hiding from reality in my imaginary world, in order to block out losing my mother. Some days I felt I had sunk so deep into its story, that the real world was completely out of reach. It was what I needed, it was what I wanted, and as Katie experienced the different places and characters…. so did I as I created them. But like all things time moves on, and I have begun to need my family and friends, and maybe… after such a long time of working so hard and being hidden in this place, it is time for me to turn back, and return to the surface. So in truth ….. It is my real life echoed in Katie’s story – this picture is like the first breath above the surface for both of us, It is the remembrance of home, the spell is breaking,………. her eyes are open, and the breeze through her hair is calling for her return.
It is a milestone picture in the series, and there is a reason why the light is so strong on her face …..  someone is coming to guide her……… and with them they will bring a change to the current darkness of Wonderland. And finally, yellow……why is yellow important you might be thinking? Well maybe if you click your heels together and close your eyes, you’ll remember it can only mean one thing …………….
that  ‘There’s No Place Like Home’ ……….

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Finally  (I just couldn’t help myself). I had to share this behind the scenes picture of Katie, it makes me laugh so much. Sorry to shatter the mood of the pictures, but theres really nothing funnier that an extraordinary crisp-eating leaf creature deep in the woods to make you go home smiling :) !!

Oh and  I just wanted to post a reminder  that on January 26th  I will be holding my first in depth lecture  about the Wonderland series and its creation, at award winning Lisa Devlin’s ‘Photography Farm
The talk is part of a week of workshops and lectures from industry experts ranging from photography, through to light painting, blogging and film. I will be covering a wide range of areas, discussing my working process, and how I push to create a whole new world in front of the camera. I will talk how to approach grand ideas with little budget, making props and working out in the landscape with a tiny team, as well balancing a collection of images and investing your time into producing a concise body of work.  In short, my personal learning curve from the series first being discovered online by the public, to now working as a full time artist. There is further information on the website, and you can make your bookings direct with Lisa here . I will also be bringing some of the costume pieces and a couple of the big framed prints for people to see first hand.